The Dance
by peanutbutterer
Summary: Kensi, Deeks, and bulgogi. Post-ep to 5x03.


"I didn't actually expect you to continue doing that dance all through dinner."

Kensi shrugs but doesn't stop her little shimmy. "I really like bulgogi."

"And it doesn't even have any chocolate in it."

She takes another bite and makes a yummy noise. She's going to have to stop being so damn adorable if he's expected to refrain from launching himself across the table.

It's actually nice now - now that he's fully admitted to himself how he feels. It's freeing not to have to censor his own thoughts; to imagine the things he wants - the things he's wishing for - and not feel guilty about it.

Of course, it would be nicer to actually allow himself to _act_ on those thoughts, but... well. One step at a time.

"There will be chocolate later, though," she informs him.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yup," she says around a mouthful of steamed veggies. "Ice cream."

He snags the menu that's sitting between them and starts to scan it. "I didn't realize they had ice cream here."

"I have some in my freezer."

He laughs, picturing it instantly. "So you're going to go home, curl up on the couch and eat rocky road straight from the carton."

"If you want to join me, I have an extra spoon."

He places the menu back onto the table. "Are you suggesting that we spoon later?"

She ignores him and refocuses her attention on the bulgogi. They eat in silence for a while - her, mostly, because he does more gazing than eating. Luckily, she's too focused on ensuring she consumes every last drop than on noticing where his attention is. When she finishes the dish she starts scraping up the remaining sauce with her finger, sucking it off in a manner that is simultaneously sexy and disgusting.

She removes her finger from her mouth with an audible pop. "How was the first day back? Everything you hoped it would be?"

He drags his gaze away from her lips. "Well, I spent some quality time stuffed in the back of a car, launched myself down a steep incline without regard for my personal wellbeing, and rocked a pair of skinny jeans while wearing a shirt that the nineties threw up on, so - yeah, exactly what I imagined."

She smiles. "Those jeans were pretty tight."

He rolls his eyes. "You don't focus on the thrilling heroics, of course."

"I dunno. It was awfully heroic of those pants to squeeze that close around your butt."

He grins back at her, but the moment passes as she continues.

"So," she says as she reaches across the table and stabs some of his neglected bulgogi, "does that mean that you're coming back tomorrow?"

He pushes his plate out so she can reach it better. "Yeah, it does."

"And still taking it one day at a time?"

She sounds hesitant all of a sudden, worried, and he's quick to put her mind at ease. "I told Callen I'm here for good."

"Really?"

"Really."

The smile returns. "Good."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, of course."

"It is nice to have someone laugh at your totally not funny torture jokes."

"About that, Deeks -"

He waives her off. "They weren't unfunny because of the timing Kens, I'm okay."

"No," she shakes her head, "no, it's not that - and they totally were funny, by the way - it's..." She picks her napkin off her lap and sets it on the table, where she proceeds to fiddle with it. "I did miss you, and not just because," she cuts herself off with a shake of her head and deliberately drags her eyes up to meet his. "I missed you because you're my best friend, and when you're not around there's a void. And I'm sorry I didn't admit that earlier. I don't know what's the matter with me."

He knows exactly why she didn't admit that earlier. And he understands it, really. They've been playing this game for a long time and just because he's ready to show his hand doesn't mean that she is.

"I shouldn't have teased you."

"Yes, you should have. I'm glad you did. It feels like things are starting to be normal again." She puts her hand up to forestall the objection he never even considered voicing. "I know they're not, and I'm not trying to minimize your recovery, but I just - I'm glad we're joking."

He nods. "I'm glad too."

She sighs and he can see the tension leave her. "You want to get out of here?"

* * *

"We could have stopped at the store, you know."

She uses her spoon to point at the carton in his hands. "You can get more if you scrape around the edges."

He does as instructed, scooping up a little melted ice cream into his spoon and then passing the container back to her. She's about as thorough with it as she was her plate at dinner.

"If you're refraining from licking it clean on my account, don't."

She glares at him. "I wasn't."

"Sure you weren't."

They've been on her couch for about twenty minutes now, watching the television but not actually watching it. It's been nice, quiet and companionable and he doesn't want to go. But it's late and Monty's at home and there's no ice cream left as an excuse to keep him here.

"I should head out," he says at the same time as she says, "Did Callen ask -"

"Sorry," she says, "I'm sure you're tired."

He tries his best to keep the eagerness out of his voice, but he'd cling to any reason not to walk out that door. "No, that's okay. What were you saying?"

"You said earlier that you told Callen you were back. Is that because he asked?"

He doesn't really want to get into the discussion he had with his team leader. Callen's heart and head were clearly in the right place, but the guy could take a course or two in people skills. "Basically, yeah."

"He missed you," she says, and it totally takes him aback. "They all did."

He's not quite sure how to respond, so he goes with the first thing that comes to mind. "I laugh at their unfunny jokes, too."

"Come on, I already apologized for that."

"Doesn't mean I can't hold it over you for a while. It's only been a few hours; I should at least get an entire evening out of it."

She deposits the empty ice cream carton on the coffee table and tosses her spoon inside. He hands her his spoon and she tosses that in as well.

He leans back against the couch and folds his hands on his chest. "I'm sure it wasn't the same without me."

"I got to drive a lot less."

"The horror."

"I hate being in the back of that damn Challenger," she grumbles. "But heaven forbid they ride in my car or check out an SUV for the day."

He imagines Sam righting shotgun in the SRX and Callen riding in the back. It's an awesome picture. "They think they can squeeze into Hetty's Cobra, they should be able to squeeze into your car."

"Right?" She leans back on the couch next to him, her shoulder brushing his.

It reminds him of the other night when he fell asleep during the movie - when he woke up with Kensi's head on his chest and her hand fisted in his shirt.

It must trigger the same memory for her because she asks quietly, "Are you sleeping more now?'

He shrugs and it rubs his shoulder against hers. "Better than I was, yeah."

"Nightmares?"

"I don't really..." he trails off. He doesn't really want to get into it but he doesn't want to hide things from her. He doesn't want to hide anything anymore. "Yeah, some."

Her head drops onto his shoulder. "I wish I could help."

"You are."

"I wasn't."

"I wouldn't let you."

She snorts a little laugh. "When have you ever been able to stop me from doing what I want to do?"

"I'm sure there's been one or two occasions." Though he can't think of any at the moment.

"I should have tried harder. I just thought maybe you wanted space and -"

"I did. I wanted space." He wanted space to clear his head and figure some things out. When Kensi's around he has a really hard time thinking clearly about anything at all.

"Still, I should have been there. I should have been more supportive."

"You got me a delicious cronut."

"Please tell me you didn't eat it."

"I didn't eat it."

"Good."

"I had it mounted and put it on my shelf."

"That's disgusting. And I meant supportive by actually being there for you."

"You're here now."

"I am. And I'm going to be here whether you want it or not."

"I want it."

She turns her head and looks up at his eyes, and she's close - so close. He would barely have to move to kiss her.

"Good," she whispers.

"Kensi -"

She moves up to press her lips against his and he immediately melts into her, body turning and wrapping around her without conscious thought. His hands are on her back and she's practically on his lap and _jesus_, this is better than he ever imagined - and he imagined it plenty.

She tears her lips away from his only long enough to pull his shirt over his head. He pries them apart again so he can remove hers.

"We should," she says against his lips. "Bed."

He slides his hands down her back, intending to lift her up and carry her to the other room, but he gets distracted when they find her ass.

"Next time," he promises as his fingers dig into the waistband of her jeans. "Bed next time."

* * *

It's the second time in a week he's woken up with his partner draped on top of him and it's most definitely something he could get used to.

"Morning," she says, nuzzling deeper into his chest.

He squeezes his arm more tightly around her. "Morning."

"You okay?"

He kisses her head. "Fabulous, actually. But I still think we should talk."

"I know, I just - I wanted to get that out of the way first."

"And the subsequent times?"

"I may have gotten a little caught up."

He laughs. "Isn't it traditionally the discussion part that needs to be dealt with before the sex and not the other way around?"

"I think we can both agree we're far from traditional."

"True." He takes a moment to remember the exact way this feels - the warmth of her, the weight of her. He wants to always be able to remember it, though he's fairly certain it's not something easily forgotten. "You're okay?"

He feels her nod against him. "I don't know how I would have dealt with the - the kiss, I don't know how I would have handled that if things were normal and then things were suddenly anything but normal and I kind of -"

"Panicked?"

"I was going to go with imploded, but panicked is a much nicer way of putting it."

"I don't want you to think I'm pressur-"

"Stop right there," she says, pushing up on her elbows so she can look him in the eye. "Don't for a second think that this isn't something I wanted. Completely and totally. I am all-in with you, Deeks and I just took a while to figure that out. It doesn't change that that's how I feel."

He smiles. "Well aren't you suddenly straightforward."

She rolls her eyes. "I'm not the one who never says what he means."

"Okay, I'm glad you brought that up because again I'd like to point out how totally untrue that is and I've actually prepared some examples I'd like to cite-"

He doesn't get to finish the sentence because her lips are on his and she's pushing the sheets down and maneuvering herself on top of him.

She sits up and smirks. "Let's just agree to disagree."


End file.
